pissed off!!!

wot is it wit people, thinkin they can tell u wot to do, and friends tellin u are lying to other friends!!!

ok, so heres the story, there is this quy who likes me, i like him, but not in the same way, i like him as a friend, and have made it clear to him that we are friends, which he is fine with, but he has said certain things on a certain social networking site, that cud be see as telling every1 that he likes me, he asked if he cud put it on the site and i sed ok coz i felt bad sayin no, coz it wud be like me saying he's not good enuf for me.

anyway, one of my friends added him to her profile because she 'curious' and started to talk to him, apprently he talked bout me alot. this friend sed i woz leading him on and that i needed to cum clean to him and stop lying and him and jus tell him that i dont think hes good enuf for me.

id like to point out that thats not wot i think, i may hav fort that at first, but after gettin to no him, i dont think that anymore, im jus not sexually attracted to him, he asked if it cud ever happen between us and i told him wen it cums to dating, i have 2 rules, no1 younger than me, and no friends coz id rather hav sum1 as a friend than date them and fuck it up.
he was fine wit this.

my other friend who says im lyin to him thinks differently, and told me so, wit a big attitude, b4 cuting me off on msn, wit sum lousey excuse about going away for the weekend, this friend also found out bout this blog and started reading it, even tho i told her specifically that i didnt want friends reading it, coz this is my outlet area where i get things off my chest and they may read sumthing they dont like. well friend, u sed u wanted to be mentioned in my blogg, u got it, hope u enjoy reading this!!!

on a high note, iv deffinately got my zurich job for 3months, so all my debts are gona be paid off!! woop woop, and im also working 2morrro and monday down gunwarf, so thats £75 in my back pocket!! i start zurich on tuesday!!!!! the bitch is bk!!

bye

X

xoxo

old job bk

hey, well, good news, iv got my old job that i had at college bk, im now gona be working the rides down gunwarf for the kids, that will be weekends as cover for people who want days off, then when the summer cums im gona be working there full time earnig myself a lot of money, lol, also, ill be probs gettin another job at zurich again by the looks of things, if i do that starts next week, so things are looking up!!!

cant remember if i mentioned it on here, but a guy wanted to take me out clubbin last monday nyte, and i went, well it woz free, i got completely drunk, and ended up walkin bk from bedhampton all alone, pissed outa my head going bk home to pompey, i got home at bout 8am jus in time to c my lil sister going to school, turned out as well that the guy who took me out had given me £20 to get a taxi home, but i forgot coz i woz sooooo drunk, wen he foned me tuesday to see if i had survived the trip, he told me this, i didnt believe him, so looked in my pockets, and low and behold, there woz the £20 in my bk pocket, he told me to keep it, so i made sum money that nyte, lol.

also hes decided to take me to lunch this friday coz iv got a new job, lol, after 2 1/2 months of trying, lol, its finally happened, lol.

SC my best friend has gone away for 3months, so im missing her, but shes writing a blogg so i can keep up wit her travels, lol.

my friend RS has decided to leave his boyfriend, he told me the other day and asked if i facncied going on holiday wit him in october if i saved my money, which im gona do coz i wana go, so the money i make over the summer will be payin for that, lol.

also, fort i wud look for sum new gay friends thru gumtree on the web, iv had 2 replies so far and both of them are fat, ugly and looking for sex, even tho my add clealy states im looking for gay friends to hang out wit, why is it always me?

1 of my friends another RS (girl) has decided to add the guy that i went out wit on monday to facebook and i dont no why? he didnt no why either and wen i asked her bout it, she hasnt relpied? so im sitting here wondering why? lol.

i have discovered that i like metro station, fucking awsum band!!!!! love their music, the only problem is that they have ties to hannah montanna, coz the lead singer is her big brother, lol, but still they are a great band!

also, to make a bit extra cash, i saw that sum guy had posted an add on gumtree saying he wud give bj's to guys for £25 a go, now this to me sounds like a good idea, so im considering doing sumthing along the same lines, i mean £25 a blow, im good at it, enjoy it and id be making money, sure, most people wud feel this is amoral, but im a moral person, i jus have a very grey moral area, and this sorta thing falls into that grey agrea.

well ill let u no wot i decide.

bye

X

xoxo

still looking

hello out there, well my internet has bin down now for about 2 weeks which has bin shit, only coz the bill wasnt paid tho, but now it is so all is good, well, where to start?

first things, that new job i was telling you about the last time i blogged, well, i lost it, how? i called in sick when i wasnt, (but they didnt know that) and they got huffy bout it and gave me the sack, then cancelled their contract with the agencey i work for, so, didnt hav much work wit the agencey after that, they did give me a 2 day job cleaning a shop, and that ends 2moro, lol, so still looking for a job, but my unkle knows sum1 who myte hav sum bar work for me, im hoping that i get it coz the guy knows my unkle so get it thru association, lol.

secondly, that new bf i woz telling you about, i dumped him after 2weeks, he got too clingy and he woz fucking me around, and im the type of person who doesnt really give out second chances, but wit this guy i gave him 3 strikes and he used all 3 up and kept me waiting around. he was also always claiming that i woz cheating on him, and the whole relationship was based round him, everything was about him and i jus got pissed off, he was also always going on about his ex, so after speaking wiv my best friend KF, i told her id be dumping him that nyte, i did, he woz completely pissed, so i went to his, got my stuff and dumped him, then didnt speak to him for about 2 days, that is until he started txting me tellin me i woz acting like a child, but i told him i wanted nuffin to do wit him, but he sent me abusive txts for a week, saying that we shud at least be friends and that i shud jus stop playin games, until i jus gave in and sed id be friends wiv him, after this txt was sent, he sed good, so now that we are friends, why dont u say sori and cum round my and ride my cock.
sori, but delusional world is he living in where he thinks that coz i sed we wud be friends, that im gona cum round and ride his cock after he has sent me abusive txts for a week, and even if i wanted to ride his cock, i wudnt coz he woz a twat!!! and i dumped him for a reason, lol.
he woz 28 and always acting like a child, lol, i fort older guys new wot they wanted, but after dating him, iv sundenly realised that i need to date a guy my own age.

on a better note, i went to see a psychic las saturday, was reeli good, she wasnt a fake, coz she new stuff that i keep dark and hidden and not even any of my friends no, and i tell them everything. she red my tarrot and generally told me type of person i was, wot wud be happening in the nex couple of months for me, wot id be good at doing for a job, and generally everything that u wud expect, and everything u wudnt, lol, she even told me things about my dead nan, that there was no way she cud hav known.

why is it that when u hav no money/job, all ur friends want u to go out wiv them? im lucky tho coz all my friends hav started paying for my nytes out, lol, 1 in particular (LR) is a very good friend and has paid for several of my nytes out in the last month, she is a reeli good friend, and tells me all the time that if she wants me to go out, i hav no choice, lol, 2 weeks ago she introduced me to EM, who is american, brilliant and like LR, is into girls, lol, so me and EM ended up in a strip club las friday, and me being poor, i didnt hav to pay for anything, EM bought me a few lapdances, lol, which didnt turn me on as it was from women, lol.
id feel guilty if i was taking peoples money and i had a job, but i dont feel guilty coz these are my friends, and they wudnt pay for me to go out unless they wanted to, lol.

well, this woz a long 1 2day, but i had a lot to get off my chest, lol, oh, 1 more thing, wen i do go out it EM, i always seem to get stupidly drunk that i dont remember anything the nex day, well that happened on frieday and i lost me blackberry, luckily i hav insurance on it, and got a new one 2 days later, so i hav a brand new blackberry, lol.

bye.

X

xoxo

new month, new job, new boyfriend

hello, i no, bin a long time yet again, but i cudnt help it this time, iv bin a very bisey bee, lol, i got a new job at the beginning of the month and a new boyfriend, oh yes a reel life bf, lol, but its bin 2 weeks into the month and both of these hav been lost, lol.

1st - the new job woz only a cleaning job from the agency that i work for but hey, it woz paid work and beggers cant be choosers, only problem is that it lasted 3 days, why i hear u ask, well, i woz very ill on the 4th day due to food poisening and cudnt go in and foned in sick, which they didnt like, so not only did they fire me, but they also cancelled their contract wiv adecco, adecco foned me to tell me this, and sed in a way that sugested to me that the wudnt be doing it, that they wud fone me if anymore work came in, lol, it hasnt, lol.

2nd - i got a bf, my first 1, lol, introduced to me thru a lesbian friend, he is 27, tall, good luking and as it turns out, a complete control freak, i new him for a month, and started dating him after 2weeks of knowing him, then yesterday i dumped him, why, coz he is not over his last bf and im not gona be any1s rebound, that and the fact that he woz jus plain crazy and called me a dirty lil slut coz i like to go to hampshire bulevard, hes not aloud in for sum reason, but wudnt tell me why and the last straw woz wen i bought a ticket to the easter party for there yesterday, which he didnt like, and i cud see this relationship going in a direction i didnt like, but now hes trying to get bk together askin me wot i want, but its not me who has to make the choice, its him, hes jus not ready, and he kept compairing me to his ex who he broke up wiv 9months ago. sad reeli that tha woz my 1st relationship and it lasted all of 2 weeks, lol.

so, hb las nyte woz fucking awsum, free bar all nyte, lol, thats why i went, being poor wit no job or money i used my last £15 to go, lol, my friend SD from zurich came wiv me coz we aint sin each other in ages, well good nyte, lov that place,

well thats my rant for the week, or is it, who knows, sumthing myte pop up in the week and ill hav another, ill update on the job situation as it changes, but looks like im gona hav to sign on this week, woopty doo (i say wiv sarcasm)

X

xoxo

good bye zurich

well, no again its bin a long time, but hey, i woz always working, and by the time i came back home id be too tired to write here, well, not anymore, coz this pompey gay boi has quit his shithole job at zurich!! (btw, is shithole 1 or 2 words? hmmmmm?)

yep, i had a week off las week thinking that if i did, id want to cum back to zurich and that id realise that i had a pretty good job, well it had the complete oppersite effect, i got into zurich on monday morning, ready for work, when i got in there, i was ready to cry, i couldnt understand why i felt this way, everyday there, till i realised it woz because we had all this pressure placed on us, and if things wernt done, we were made to feel like it was our fault, wen it reeli wasnt, if ur gona make half the staff redundant, most of the beta staff, (a few of the beta staff stayed) and getting them to work wit twice the work load, then its ur own fault wen u dont get the results u expected!!

anyway got in there and had a feeling that i was skating on thin ice coz i kept having days off here and there jus coz i didnt want to be there, i wen to c my boss at 12 for a meeting and told her i wanted to quit, she cudnt believe it, she didnt want me to quit and sed so, but sed that if i was feeling the way that i did, it woz only a temp job and that i shudnt stay for sumthing like this if it made me feel this way, i felt so good, leaving that afternoon, i woz free, and suddenly i had all these possiblities to consider, writer, commedian, teacher, there are so many things that i wana do, and now i cud do them!!

iv sent bout about 15 applications for jobs now, only bar work and waiting and sales assistants, but ill tell u this, im shittin myself now, coz if i dont find a job soon, im fucked, and trust me to jack in my job when there is a economic crisis, lol, but hopefully ill find sumthin, if i hav to ill turn to prostitution, im not adverse to it, i go to the gym, and ill be paid for sumthin fun, lol, but thats a las resort, because there is no way im gona be on the doll, its full of white trash, and im not gona be 1 of them, iv done it once and felt so dirty afterwards, (my mum made me when i quit uni, dont judge).

so now im sitting here writing to u lot, jus to tell u how good it feels to be a free agent, lol, and also how good it feels to no that im never gona hav to c SL from work again!!! the only thing that kills me is knowing that i cant go clubbin untill i get another job, which is a bitch coz it means that i wont get to c the cute blonde barman who i reeli reeli reeli fancy, lol,
luv ya

X

xoxo

long time no see

well, sori its bin a long time, jus bin reeli reeli busy at the moment, well, i say busy, jus reeli tired, by the time i cum home from work its 5pm, and im jus exhausted, lol, so, wots been happening in the world of the pompy gay boi? well, i went to leeds on the 20th feb for my bday, clubbin, woz well good, i reeli enjoyed it, KF and me wen shopping on the friday and saturday, KF wanted to go to all the expesive shop like westwood and harvey nickols, lol, which i didnt want to go to coz i think its to expesive, lol.
sat we were out all day shoppin for me so i cud by sum more clothes for clubbin that nyte, got sum new shirts and tops, and a new bag, lol, i cudnt resist, oh, and 2 pairs of new shoes, look very nice on me.
so sat nyte clubbin woz reeli good, we only wen to 1 main gay club and spent most of the nyte there, but if i hadnt bin going home the nex mornin, i wud hav pulled, why? coz sum reeli cute blonde guy cudnt keep his hand off my arse all nyte, everytime i turned round, he woz there havin a good feel, no i didnt encorage him, but i didnt dicourage either, lol. didnt get too drunk that nyte, but i got drunk enuf to look at the poles supplied by the club for dancing, to think, yeah, ill be grindin that tonyte, which i did, i think id make a very good pole dance, i enjoyed it and didnt cause myself any damage, lol, wel, there are vids and pics of me doing on my facebook, but not tellin who i am so url neva get to c them, lol.

oh, i got asked out on a date to las thursday for las saturday, woz having a reeli low day thursday, and RM, sum1 iv only met once, kept on and on at me for a date, so in the end i sed yes coz i felt bad sayin no, and also everytime we speak on facebook, he tells me how good looking i am, so i fort, fuck it, i need an ego boost, ill do it, all my friends told me not to, coz i cud do better, but i needed to be told sum nice things, they sed he woz only saying it coz he wanted to get into my boxers, which is probably true, but it wud never happen, no matter how drunk i got, lol, wel, saturday came, and i foned him saying i cudnt make it coz i didnt reeli like him and i had a lil bit of a hangova, coz my new lesbian friend had made me go out on the friday. RM wos fine wit is as he sed that he'd had a disaster wit a bottle of fake tan, that put me off for good after that, ewh, fake tan, its so...........fake! lol. well till nex time

p.s. ill try to make it on here daily, lol, get back into the swing of things.

x

xoxo

21st

wel, the birthday came and went, and it was brilliant!!!
went into work yesterday at 8am, and brought in cakes and sweets for my team members, wot i wasnt counting on was that they had all chipped in and bought me a card and a huge bottle of decent vodka, my fav drink at the mo. so, got into work and spent the first half of the day thinking that it woz ok to be in work on my 21st birthday, then when 2pm came, thats wen it hit me..... i didnt want to be in work, and i got a lil depressed and did very lil work. 4pm came and work finished, so went home and basically relaxed for an hour b4 i had to be out again to go to my friends house for 7 coz we were going to have dinner together, she paid, im nothing if not a gentleman, lol.
no reeli, she sed i wasnt alout to pay as it woz her treat me, she had also bought me a book that woz an proof read book, meanin it had been sent out to others b4 its propa publishin date, SC sed it was an extrodinary find, i cant wait to get a chance to read it.

so, birthday presents, i got £81 in total, a brand new digital camera, some jewllery, and some odds and sods. reeli good birthday this year, and iv got this friday to look forward to, coz me and KF are going to leeds for the weekend!!! woop woop.

today i didnt go into work, i told them that id drunk too much las nyte wit SC and that i had a hang ova, they were fine coz it woz my 21st, and its not like they cud do anything, i mean, it woz my 21st, coming of age.
so 2day i spent the day doing a lil shopping, bought a couple of DVDs, and a couple of books, iv now completed my twilight series, bought the last 3 books for £15 in HMV, love that shop, plus there are a couple of guys who work there that i reeli fancy, so its nice to be served by some eye candy, lol, not that i think bout that sorta thing alot.....jus most of the time. well, till next time.

X

xoxo